The March issue of Among Worlds magazine has been mailed out! Yeah!!!
It so happened that I had company the weekend of the appointed mailing. Now...that shouldn't be a problem except that it created a lot of stress for me. How do I get the magazine mailed out to all the subscribers/readers and not have that deter from the time I wanted to spend with my friend who was visiting?
You remember from one of the Star Treks movies the scene where Spock says "The needs of the many outweigh the need of one"? Well...I didn't follow his example. Yeah...I admit it, I was selfish. I spent that weekend enjoying the company of my friend, going to the mountains, spending an entire day shopping at Asian stores (ahhhh...the memories that 'smell' can evoke from some of those stores!), talking, laughing, and just enjoying our time together.
On the last evening of the visit, my friend helped me get the magazines ready for mailing. We joked and laughed and talked some more - all while we were stuffing, labeling, sealing, stamping and sorting. So in the end, the needs of the many were met...and the need of the one (me) was also met.
The hardest part of the visit was, of course, the farewell. I know that you who read this will nod your heads in agreement. Is there a general "correct/right" way to say goodbye or is it something that is very individual? I like to think the Indonesian expression of "Sampai Ketemu Lagi" [Until we meet again] is a good one.
How can we handle farewells in a way that is healthy? Ideas, anyone?
Margie
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5 comments:
Well that was fast! I got my magazine in the mail on Monday. Wow!
i only know the unhealthy ways of coping- run/ignore/deny/avoid. i did just find out that ostriches don't bury their heads in the sand though; they either lay their necks down flat or let those long legs help them make a hasty exit!
Healthy? No clue.
99.8% of the time I'm extraordinarily nonchalant...which may possible come across as cold. I've been around long enough to know that I might see this person in another time and place....or not at all. Either way, it's meant to be. Then again, .2% of the time I absolutely lose it. Would sure be nice if I could figure out a calm, happy medium. :)
I guess my approach to saying good bye is about the same as yours, musicnmath. I think I appear cold. I don't think that's unhealthy, but it can seem rude. (On the other hand, would bursting into tears be preferable? Maybe sometimes. But I'd prefer not to.)
The nice thing about my brother, as opposed to other friends, is that he understands exactly what is going on when we say good bye.
The last time I said good bye to my brother was a few weeks ago. He had shown up unexpectedly (from a city three hours away) to collect a few of his things and to tell me that he was leaving the country for an indefinite period of time. He stayed for a couple of hours, and then it was time to leave. He stopped in the doorway and looked at me. I felt just a little shaky. "Well, good bye," he said. I gave him a hug and then stepped back. "Take care of yourself." His friend who had given him a ride was looking at us strangely. I don't know what he was thinking. I told him, "It's always a little strange when my brother and I say good bye to each other -- we never know when or where we'll see each other again." My brother added, "It could be in any country, and it will probably be when we weren't planning on it."
That time, saying good bye brought to mind memories of other times that we've had together. It is very special to have a companion who went through this TCK journey with me, and it is very enjoyable now to walk different paths that frequently cross.
Ingrid
As i read the articles in the different issues, there's a lot that I can relate to and that makes me say, "Oh! That's why I feel like that!" But they also make me realize how much worse life could be! I'm blessed to have had a pretty smooth transition, I think. I thank God and my parents and my extended "family" of Christians for helping me in that! Maybe I was more prepared than some, I don't know, but while I struggle with some things there's never been a HUGE crisis or breakdown.
I do notice that now that I'm out of college and working, my circle of friends is totally different & I'm hanging out mostly with my Brazilian friends! It's kind of funny. I just love being with them and any other international person. :)
I totally relate to the awkward or nonexistent goodbyes as well. Most of the time I can say bye to people, cry, take time to say bye to places, etc. but other times it doesn't work out to see the person who's leaving or whatever, and then it's not even that big of a deal to me! It's weird. When I graduated from college this spring I didn't even spend the last few days hanging out with friends because my mom & sister were around. I didn't say bye to hardly any of them in the rush of grad & moving, and yet it didn't seem bad. So I think in some ways I really do avoid saying bye or think it's not important or something! Maybe I need to start affirming them more and actually keeping in touch with more college friends instead of only international or Brazilian friends!! I mean c'mon, they were important to me a year ago...!
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